Journal Prompts #1 Letting Go

Finding the space to move on

I’m introducing a new monthly series exclusively for my paid subscribers - these journal prompts are designed to help gently guide you to a deeper understanding of yourself. I’ll be focusing each month on the issues that matter most to you, based on your requests for more guidance.

With each prompt, I will be offering some therapy-based theories to help you uncover the ‘why’ behind your thoughts and emotions which will hopefully welcome in a richer path to self-awareness, self-discovery, and self-understanding.

On letting go …

There’s a place that can feel heavy, swathed in suffocating swirls of feelings and stored memories. This space holds us down, pinning us beneath its self-visualised weight. It’s the heaviness of holding on.

People come to my private practice holding the pain of this. And it can be a heavily decorated veil of shame, confusion, anger, loss, and loneliness but with a desperate need to be understood.

While I listen with the intent to understand, I observe clients embracing a deeper self-exploration and finding answers by tapping into their inner wisdom. It's a beautiful thing to witness.

And with this, there’s movement - I see the shame subsiding. Things become clearer. And whilst the pain may linger, there’s less of a hold. It looks like a sense of freedom.

There’s an invitation to let self-compassion in. There’s less self-harshness. There’s an answering to self. A taking of self-responsibility and a renewed energy.

So, taking the beauty I witness in the therapy room, I’m offering you some therapy-based style journaling prompts for you to explore if you’re struggling to let go, interspersed with a little theory where it may help:

1. What does the concept of letting go mean to you? This process of delving into your internal narrative on letting go enables you to tap into your own cognitive framework. Simply defining your own beliefs here can start to open up new ways of thinking as you may find new insight as you start to explore. Especially when you start to ask yourself gentle prompts around why you believe your definitions. Can you challenge them?

Also, the very notion of exploring what letting go means can bring a shift within our nervous system that can be interesting to explore. A shift of ease may help you move forward whereas any tension may guide you to explore further with a little gentle curiosity. There are answers within as we ask ourselves questions. Listen to the whispers, what are they trying to tell you?

2. What would the benefits of letting go look like to you? This calls for visualisation and is used often within the model of positive psychology - not in a toxic positive way but as a gentle guide to help bring your nervous system some ease. Take a moment to reflect on how this visualisation makes you feel. Maybe also explore what is holding you back from letting go.

3. What does your life look & feel like without the burden of holding on? Again, this uses the tools of visualisation to imagine. Notice what comes up for you. Get curious. It can help activate the calmer states within your nervous system and bring you out of those feelings of fight/flight/freeze (stress responses).

4. What fears and anxieties are attached to the feeling of letting go? Our ability to let go can be based on our attachment style that we learned in childhood.

If you have an anxious attachment style, you may find the process of letting go challenging, as you may fear abandonment and seek constant reassurance from your relationships. You may feel a strong need to cling tightly to what you’re struggling to let go of. This can cause intense anxiety and a resistance to release it.

Whereas, if you have an avoidant attachment, you may handle letting go by distancing yourself emotionally. You might detach quicker than someone with an anxious attachment style, but you may suppress your emotions which may cause longer term emotional stress.

If you’re securely attached, you may still feel the pain of letting go but are more likely to have the resources to acknowledge and process your emotions and ultimately find a way to move forward healthily.

5. Take a moment to reflect on the role of self-compassion in the process of letting go. How can you be kinder and more forgiving toward yourself in this moment? Self-compassion is about treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding you'd offer a friend. This gentle reframing practice can help boost self-esteem and overall well-being, and even help ease symptoms of anxiety and depression.

It can be challenging for some due to the unhelpful societal messages of having to be self-reliant and cope with everything without help.

This isn’t realistic. Humans were not designed to do life alone and under such self-pressure. Our nervous system functions optimally when it can healthily regulate, and this ultimately requires meeting ourselves with self-compassion.

6. What’s one small step you can take today to move forward to letting go? Using the concept of self-responsibility for our actions and emotions can help lead us to improved mental health as we can feel empowered to take agency for our life, step into looking after ourselves and viewing ourselves as someone we can be moved towards caring for.

I always like to remind myself that “I need me, too.” This gentle shift of perspective in viewing ourselves as a person with needs can be helpful when reflecting on letting go.

Remember that journaling is a very personal experience. I find that being deeply honest with myself through the gentle prompting and exploration is the most helpful way for me to move through my emotions and any issues in life that sometimes need a bit more from me.

And through it all, notice, notice, notice. What shifts?

Also, the journey of letting go can’t be rushed - it's a process that takes time and oodles of self-compassion. Move gently.

Sending love and if there is a topic you’d love some journaling prompts on, please let me know. I’d love this space to be reader led.

Helen xx